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  • Chii

Who is to blame?

When something goes wrong, or there is a crisis, what is the initial reaction? Resolution? Conflict management? Is a meeting called to gather ideas for problem-solving? All of the above? Not really. Usually, the first reaction is to look for who is to blame for what went wrong. Not that it would make the problem go away, reduce the urgency of fixing it or help in resolving the issue. Most of the time it is the exact opposite. Once the "culprit" has been found, a lot of the energy that should go into solving goes into blaming.

I've always wondered why that is. I mean, this pattern has also made us react in a certain way when there is a problem. Immediately we join the crowd who starts looking for the person at fault, to ensure that we're not the ones to be blamed. As if we are all perfect and not allowed to make mistakes. But there is a stigma with being associated with something that went wrong or even failed. Not only is it an unpleasant feeling but leaves a certain impression. It is like that stain of red wine you can't get out of your white shirt. Then what is the solution? Making sure that you never make a mistake again and if you do, ensure you cover your tracks by blaming somebody else? Sounds like a great plan. Not quite.

That approach and mindset will not help to grow and develop you as a person. That fear of making mistakes is the same fear that will keep you from moving forward and upward. Walking around trying to dodge anything that could potentially set you up for failure is not only unrealistic but will hinder you more than it will make you improve. Instead, focus on your strengths and progressing in the things you want to achieve. If you make a mistake along the way - who cares?! Try to resolve it, and if you can't, then simply take away your lessons and do better next time. Also, when things go wrong around you, be the peacemaker and resolver. Don't join others to point fingers but be part of the solution. "Deceit is in the heart of those who devise evil, But counselors of peace have joy." Proverbs 12:20 NKJV People don't realize how many great inventions were born out of things that initially "went wrong" to then discover something even greater. You never know when one person's mistake could be another person's blessing, so make sure you're on the right side. 

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